Life
Letters from Grandma
Grandma had her finger on the pulse of the town. While the names changed from letter to letter, the circumstances were always the same… and they weren’t good.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Turning Ten
“How does it feel to be ten?” I asked.
“I’m not nine yet,” he told me. “I was born at night, so I’m still nine until tonight.”
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )A Vote of Confidence
I ended up inflating the balloon to Daniel’s specifications. It ended up a little bit larger than I would have made it myself, but I thought it was manageable. I was wrestling with the end and trying to knot it up when I noticed Daniel was standing with his eyes closed and his hands across his ears.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )Get a Horse?
there is still a small market for horse drawn carriages. I’ve seen them downtown. I’ve seen them at weddings. Where do the Amish get their wagons? I’d ask them directly, but there don’t seem to be too many Amish online.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Skipping a Week on Weight Watchers
The reality is it’s easy to get lazy and it’s easy to cheat. The weather in Belvidere averages “rotten” with occasional lows in the “crappy” and “downright nasty” range. It’s very easy to look out the window and come up with an excuse not to take a long walk in the park.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )Past Sins Revisited
David loved to argue. He was passionate if not always correct. I learned a lot from arguing with my brother (mostly that it was pointless to do so).
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )The Longest Day
I came out, a gentle rain was falling. People all around me were running past. I took my time however. All the groceries were bagged in plastic and I’m not made of sugar.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Microwave Memories
The explosion had literally blown the door off the microwave. It was hanging open by one hinge and – to my horror – it was still on! We dropped to the floor to dodge the deadly radiation.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )The Day is Done
There are a half dozen picnic tables behind the Dari Ripple to seat the approximately fourteen thousand customers. Daniel had picked a flavor called “Blue Moon”; his favorite, he told me (though I didn’t remember him ever ordering it before).
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )For the Record
I found out my cylinders were the two-minute variety. I liked the Amberola players that were integrated into a wooden cabinet. However, I was told these were only for the later four-minute cylinders. I would need to get a standard model phonograph that looked like a big wooden lunchbox.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )On the Other Hand
My blog would probably get much more activity if I came out and issued blanket assumptions based on nothing more than other assumptions. Everyone loves a flame war. I am a master of the put down; ask any of my friends from junior high. Curse my UU-ism with its principled moderation!
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Stopping by Muir Woods on a Friday Morning
At ground level, the trees seemed more like partitions. I loved looking deep into the crevasses of the rough red bark. Some of them were deeper than my hand was long.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Shall We Play a Game?
The problem was the “strategy”. A number generator would pick one at random, check to make sure the space hadn’t already been played and draw it on the screen. There was no intelligence. I might have two X’s going across the top row and the computer would pick the lower right corner. I win.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Baby Stuff
One of us would carry Daniel – complete in the rocking chair / car seat – and one of us would carry the stuff. Daniel’s diaper bag was the size of a small cooler.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Thoughts on the Passing of Millvina Dean
I’ve always felt like a single thread intertwined in the middle of a patchwork quilt that makes up our history. As I asked my mom and dad about the past, Daniel asks me now about watching the Bears win a Super Bowl, remembering when President Nixon resigned, seeing Scooby Doo on television when it was brand new.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Review – I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream…
If you have ever wrestled with a box of ice cream, trying to pry out a chunk with a cold metal scooper, you would have been impressed too. It reminded me of watching the guys flip pizza dough at Italian restaurants when I was a kid.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )A Fish Story
My first cast went about three feet, but my next one hit the river. Daniel did better; he hit the deep water on his first try. And when we left after an hour or so, our little Styrofoam cooler had his sole catch on ice.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Daniel Cooks Dinner
We had a chicken thawing in the refrigerator. Meka has a great recipe for it on the grill. I threw the football with Daniel until the shadows covered most of the backyard. It was almost 8:00 by then and neither the chicken nor Meka had moved.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Third Grade Origami
“So what did you do in school today?” I asked. I ask this almost every day and usually get one of the following answers:
* “Same thing as yesterday.”
* “I don’t remember.”
* “I had recess and then I ate lunch.”
Like Son, Like Father
Daniel continued to slurp noisily, capturing the last few shake molecules at the bottom of the cup. He craned his neck to peer at my half-finished page. He frowned. “I can’t read your handwriting,” he said. “It’s too messy.”
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Senior Moment at the Age of Nine
Daniel was half eating / half wearing a caramel sundae. We were seated at one of the tall tables in the front of the restaurant. “I think I’m losing my mind,” said Daniel. I had to ask.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )On the Subject of Telephones
There were a myriad of ways I could have answered the question. I might have answered with just a simple “no”. I might have said I used to text quite a lot, except back then we called it “sending a postcard”. I split the difference and explained that – no – I didn’t text when I was young. The technology hadn’t been invented yet.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Hey, Hey, We Were the Monkees
It was my dream that we could be just like the Monkees. There were four of us and there were four of them. Out of our group, I was the only one who played any kind of musical instrument, but – even then – I didn’t see that as a major obstacle.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )The Restaurant Next Door II
It was one of those old school steakhouses done up in Early American Dungeon. Everything was brick and wrought iron with thick wooden beams stained dark like walnut. Each booth came equipped with a small lamp with a bulb about the size of the one in a refrigerator.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )Slow and Steady Cheats to Win
There’s a paved path about a mile around the soccer fields and baseball diamonds. Normally, I walk out there as part of my Weight Watchers goal and general Beatles-like desire to be “half the man I used to be”.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Breaking and Entering
I made a circuit around the house with Daniel sheepishly trailing me. The screen door was locked. The sliding glass door was unlocked, but a thick piece of dowel rod was sitting in the door rail. Considering how cheaply made our house seems, the windows turned out to be surprisingly secure.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 6 so far )Asking for It by Name
“Can we get Fruit Loops?” he asked.
“We are getting Fruit Loops,” I replied. Daniel shook his head.
“No, I mean real Fruit Loops.” Now it was my turn to sigh.
The Airport Hustle
I really like the moving sidewalk setup in the Louisville airport. The signs tell people who are standing still to stay on the right side. This allows people who are walking to pass them on the left side. However, I got behind a guy who was – technically – walking, but moving so slowly that people walking (walking, mind you) on the non-moving floors on either side were passing us by.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Daniel’s Compensation Package
With a clearing of the throat and a sneeze of blue smoke, it roared into life on the first hard yank of the pull cord. I mowed around the edges of the yard and did the precision mowing around the bushes and trees. Daniel did a lot of the straight back-and-forth cutting. For the first time, I think Daniel did at least half of the lawn. I thought about offering him a job.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Grandma’s Breakfast
There is a fine line between crisp bacon and burnt bacon. When we’d go out with Grandma, she would fight with waitresses over this point. Her bacon was crisp to the point of being dry, but never burnt. It crumbled in your mouth.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )Miscellaneous Anonymous Fish
the fish hide so much, I think Meka just feeds them on faith; assuming they’re still in there… somewhere. Almost every guest we’ve had to the house has asked if we plan to get fish for the tank.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Welcome! You Have Porn!
I had been connecting to computers for years, primarily via bulletin board systems. However, I could only connect to one computer at a time that way. And – unless I had a lot of money to put towards the phone bill – I couldn’t connect to a system unless it was nearby.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Spider Hunting
Last year we had a couple of garden spiders that were as colorful as Pepper, our rental parrot. I left them alone out there to spin their webs, catch their bugs and crawl around wherever they pleased. In the fall, if I found them in the house, they were dead.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )College Memories: Hair!
I needed to be ready to sing a song between the years 1965 and 1975. I picked Norwegian Wood by the Beatles. I quickly figured out I was in trouble when I showed up with a cassette of Rubber Soul to sing along with. Everyone else brought sheet music.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Three Little Words
Often times Daniel looks as confused and mystified as I do; he truly doesn’t know why he did what he did. This was one of those times.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )On the Subject of Poetry
I wrote that line and had some ideas I wanted to convey. But it was still too early. The emotion I felt was too deep. It came from somewhere in my reptilian brain and defied any attempt to put it into language, short of a cross between a low growl and a plaintive howl to the sky.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )There’s a Right Way…
To my surprise, the Internet showed my account was all paid up and it rejected my manual payment because it was too much money. I made one last phone call, asking – nay, begging them to please take my f$%^ing money.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Memory – Smaller Size Me
It had been determined the Styrofoam Quarter Pounder boxes were going to outlast the human race in our landfills, so Corporate was switching to biodegradable boxes and larger paper wrappers for the big sandwiches. Ironically, the big drinks were being poured in more permanent plastic cups.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Doctor Cars
“I think they used them to drive doctors around.” That might have been true. I grew up in the seventies and eighties. House calls were something from late night movies on television.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 4 so far )Talking Trash
Newspaper should be recycled, not thrown away.” I pointed out the recyclers only took newspaper that wasn’t covered in parrot poop. Daniel made a face and I was relieved to see it didn’t freeze in place. He heaved a sigh and headed up the stairs again, struggling mightily against the gravitational pull of the earth.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 3 so far )Ten Years After
Columbine wasn’t the first school shooting. It wasn’t the worst shooting. However, Columbine touched a nerve in me. The night before the shootings, Meka and I had spent a couple of hours on the phone, going through baby names. We had picked out “Daniel”, but we were still working on the middle name.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Non-Toxic Assets
“So, which crayons are poisonous?” he asked finally. Now it was my turn to think.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Fat Lip Service
“Okay, we didn’t want you to worry…” he started. For those who don’t have children, here’s a message from those who do: never start a conversation with those words. Ever.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Miles to Go
I did make (some of) the meetings and (occasionally) tracked my points. I did (every once in awhile) exercise. I could go on… and sadly, I think I did. All in all, I gained back about eight pounds that I had lost earlier in the fall.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )The Final Easter Egg
“I have hidden 16 eggs in the kitchen, living room and family room,” read the note signed with a large paw print. Daniel narrowed his eyes and surveyed the area. I followed him around with the camcorder as he located the egg hidden in a flowerpot, one in a box of Kleenex and another sitting in the remote charger for the Wii.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )Good Bad Service
Like waiting in line at Wal Mart; it just comes with the territory. Did you think you would get away with paying low prices without consequences? Some people might complain, make a stink, ask to see a manager. The rest of us wait with Soviet style patience
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Easter Egg Quest
Generally, our hiding places come in three skill levels. One year, I covered an egg with a note that said THERE’S NO EGG UNDER HERE.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )How I Spent My Vacation
To my surprise, my card was denied. Luckily, I had cash on me. I hardly ever carry actual money anymore.
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