Election Day Q & A


I took Daniel along with me to the polling place Tuesday morning.  If he observed the voting process, he would get yet another badge in Cub Scouts.  According to the Den Leader, the Cub Scouts were “encouraged to ask questions”.  I didn’t have to worry about Daniel.  I was inundated with questions from the moment we pulled into the parking lot.

Yes, this is a long line.  Normally, I don’t have to wait at all to vote.  No, I’m sure you won’t be late for school.  Yes, it is a nice day.  It’s a good thing; I’d hate to be standing outside if it was raining or cold.  Yes, the line is moving.  It just takes time because there are a lot of things to vote on.  I’m sure people are voting as fast as they can.  No, you won’t be late.  We’ve been waiting ten minutes.  We still have half an hour before school starts.  No, you can’t have a cookie.  The cookies are for people who voted.  No, you can’t vote.  You have to be 18.  No, I think the show on Nickelodeon where “Kids Pick the President” was just a show, not an actual election.  Sorry, kiddo.  Yes, you can have my cookie after I vote.  Thanks for pointing out to everyone in line that I shouldn’t eat cookies because I’m on Weight Watchers.

No, I don’t think you’ll be late for school.  We still have time.  The election judge is looking up my name in the book of registered voters.  I’ve voted in every election since I was 18 years old.  I hope I’m in the book!  No, they didn’t give out cookies each time.  I think they just do that here.  Yes, Belvidere is a special place.  Let’s move down the table.  This is another election judge.  I think she looks up my name if it begins with a different letter.  I suppose they could just have one big book of everybody’s name.  I don’t know why they didn’t think of it.  Good idea.  You can write a letter to the newspaper after you get home.

No, I don’t think you will be late for school.  Yes, you can hold the ballot.  Yes, you can hold the ballot privacy cover.  Yes, you can hold the marker.  No, you can’t fill it in.  That’s voting.  Come on.  I already said you can have my cookie afterwards.  I know it doesn’t have seats like the booths at McDonald’s.  I don’t know why they call it a booth.  Yes, I am reading the instructions carefully.  No, I am not voting for Ben Franklin.  That’s just an example.  Yes, I’m sure they know he’s dead.  It’s just an example on how to fill in the circles on the ballot completely so the machine reads it right.  I’m voting as fast as I can.  Don’t worry; you won’t be late.

No, we won’t forget the cookie.

No, John McCain doesn’t get to be vice president if he comes in second.  They used to do it that way, but nowadays Barack Obama and Joe Biden are a team.  If Barack Obama wins, Joe Biden gets to be the vice president.  If John McCain wins, Sarah Palin gets to be vice president.  Yes, Sarah Palin is a girl.  Yes, she would be the first girl vice president.  No, the Vice Presidents don’t get to sleep at the White House.  I think they have their own house.  Yes, I’m sure they can come over for dinner at the White House if they want to.

I voted for two candidates because that race says to pick two from the list.  Some races you pick one person, some you pick more.  Michelle Courier is running unopposed for State’s Attorney for Boone County.  That means no one else is trying to get the job.  I think they put her on the ballot because someone might have run against her.  Yes, it’s kind of silly that I have to still vote for her even when she’s unopposed.  No, I don’t want to run against her.  I like my current job and I think she’s doing all right as state’s attorney.  Yes, I’m almost done.  I just have to finish the other side.  Yes, there are two sides to the ballot.  Daniel, even if you are late for school, I will write you a note.  I’m your dad.  I can do that.

Yes, I’m done.  Yes, you can stick the ballot into the machine.  Cover it up with the privacy sheet and push it in.  No, I don’t think it would suck your fingers off.  Come on, we have five minutes to get you to school.

Yes, you can go back in and get a cookie.

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