I am an avid reader in my downtime. I happened to be “down” awhile back at a rest stop in Indiana. Unfortunately, I didn’t bring any reading material along. Luckily, there was a plethora of printed material available on the walls of the stall. In terms of legibility, it varied from a scratchy scrawl to an intricate font done up in magic marker. I have to admit, as great literature, none of it really made the grade. However, I usually don’t have time for great literature. I eat too much fiber.
The first one I noticed was writ large on the door right below where the hook used to be to hang your jacket. “FUK YOU!” it proclaimed. I was reminded of the tragic main character in Flowers for Algernon and Steinbeck’s immortal classic Of Mice and Men. Of course I assumed the misspelling was done for effect, so I refrained from making a correction with the red pen I carry for such work.
Down near the bottom of the stall was “TAP HERE FOR BLOW JOB“. I always appreciate political satire. I had to admire the dexterity required to write it so close to the floor and – frankly – respect the perseverance of the author. I don’t think I would ever get that close to the floor of a rest stop in Indiana, no matter how choice the humor might be.
Scratched deep into the paint over the locked up toilet paper roll was my favorite. It’s not the first time I’ve seen it, but it’s given me a smile every time I’ve come across it since I first read it long ago at a bowling alley in Schaumburg, Illinois. “SOME PEOPLE COME HERE TO TAKE A S$%^. I COME HERE TO LEAVE ONE.” It has everything I want in bathroom graffiti: a pithy phrase, a humorous observation, a play on words. I felt as if I had shared an intimate moment with one of the greats. Perhaps George Carlin left a s$%^ at a rest stop in Indiana; sounds like something he would have done.